About.com Parenting of Adolescents

Parenting Poll: How much money do you give your teen for Christmas shopping?

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:30:55 +0000

My daughter has a very part time job this year, therefore she has been able to save some money for Christmas shopping. After counting it up and seeing what she would like to buy her sisters and her friends, she realizes that she may not have enough. She then started looking for sales and has not - yet - asked for more money from me. The thing is, I'm not sure how much money I'm willing to give. I'm sure after talking to her I'll know better what she needs, but as a ballpark figure, I don't know. My feelings are that I was willing to give her more last year, but why should she be penalized for having a job and saving some money? I'm going to have to think about this. While I do, let's get a pulse from our parenting community with a poll - and don't forget to leave your opinion in the comments area!

Poll: How much money do you give your teen for Christmas shopping?

See the poll results.

Parenting Poll: How much money do you give your teen for Christmas shopping? originally appeared on About.com Parenting of Adolescents on Friday, November 20th, 2009 at 20:30:55.

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Do You Still Give Hugs to Your Teen?

Thu, 19 Nov 2009 06:54:35 +0000

And does your teen still let you hug them? I went to hug my 13 year old today in the grocery store because she was sad about losing a basketball game and she looked like she needed it. She backed away and looked up and down the aisle, making sure no one was there before she let me hug her.

Do you think I should have told her about the cameras stores use to keep shoplifters at bay? lol

So, fess up! Do you have to sneak in a hug or two with your teen or do they let you hug them any old time? And how important do you think hugs are?

Share on the your stories, advice and opinions in the comments area.

Do You Still Give Hugs to Your Teen? originally appeared on About.com Parenting of Adolescents on Thursday, November 19th, 2009 at 06:54:35.

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The Teenagers of the Mayflower

Tue, 17 Nov 2009 10:00:39 +0000

You can easily get your teen involved in history by digging up facts that he/she would be interested in. Since the US Thanksgiving holiday is coming up, I'll use it as an example. Below I have listed some facts about some of the teenagers who crossed the Atlantic on the Mayflower. Arm yourself with them and have a good old fashioned conversation at dinner tonight.

The Teenagers of the Mayflower originally appeared on About.com Parenting of Adolescents on Tuesday, November 17th, 2009 at 10:00:39.

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Screening Quiz: Is your teen depressed?

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 08:57:47 +0000

When your teen seems moody or sad, do you think its depression or it's just a phase? Believe it or not, depression is more common than we realize. According to a national study conducted by the Centers for Disease Control, 61 percent of 8th to 10th graders reported feeling sad and hopeless, 36 percent reported nothing to look forward to, and 34 percent expressed serious thoughts of committing suicide. Scary to think about!

It's important that parents not only think about it, but talk to our teens about it too. Talking to teens can make them feel less hopeless and help them understand or work through whatever problems they face. It will put you on your teen's side - which is right where you want to stay.

Related Resources:

Screening Quiz: Is your teen depressed? originally appeared on About.com Parenting of Adolescents on Monday, November 16th, 2009 at 08:57:47.

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Mom Asks: Opinions on Alternative Schools?

Fri, 13 Nov 2009 06:40:39 +0000

A mom on the forum asks: My 15 year old son has decided that if he skips enough school and fails enough classes, he will GET to go to an alternative school. He has several "friends" that attend, and I think he thinks it is the easy way out ("it's a shorter day and they don't care if you skip!", his words). I think ALC's provide an excellent opportunity for students that really need them, don't misunderstand. I just get the feeling my son is just being lazy, and wants more time to "play".

He does deal with ADD; trouble staying on task, staying organized, and being overwhelmed with workload. However, he goes to a wonderful school, and they are willing to work with him, he's just given up. When I say that, I mean, he is consciously skipping, and just won't do his work. He can do it, he is just not willing to put the time in. I fear he is manipulating to get what he wants, when he is doing fine where he is, if he would just stay put, and put forth a little effort. If he were really trying, and not skipping, and still struggling, I would have a different opinion.

I guess my position is, do I let him try alternative school to see if it might be a better fit for him, or do I continue to struggle with him on homework, staying in school, and failing? I want his education to be positive for him, but on the other hand, I want him to learn sometimes we need to push through something difficult to become stronger.

Denise's thoughts: It sounds to me like maybe getting him something to dream about that is bigger and better than alternative school might work. He sounds like he is not having a good experience school when he is there and he searching for something better and showing you by skipping school. Maybe you can help him find something he is good at and promote him doing it, instead of changing his school for discipline reasons? For example, does he like mechanics or would he like to try to work on cars? If so, enroll him in night fix-it classes or find a garage that needs a helper. Once teens are engaged in something they enjoy and that can help build their confidence, school and other responsibilities become easier.

Asking our community: What are your thoughts? Please share your advice and opinions in the comments area.

Mom Asks: Opinions on Alternative Schools? originally appeared on About.com Parenting of Adolescents on Friday, November 13th, 2009 at 06:40:39.

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Too Much Food in Teens' Diet Is What Is Causing Obesity

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 07:15:23 +0000

Time has reported on a new study out that blames obesity in teens more on food consumption then exercise, although it does concede that it is a combination of the two factors. Most writers just talked about how food is the culprit according to the study. That is not what it says at all. Here are some of the facts as stated in the Time.com article about the change of physical activity:

"But the survey also found that teens' overall rate of daily exercise had not changed much since 1991, when the study sample was first asked to report their participation in gym classes in school and their level of physical activity at home. The percentage of teens attending daily gym class has stayed relatively steady since 1991; on average, the yearly change in the proportion of students participating was less than 1%. The percentage of ninth- through 12th-graders getting adequate levels of moderate physical activity -- exercise such as slow bicycling, fast walking or pushing a lawn mower, which did not make participants break a sweat -- also changed very little, from 26.7% in 1999 to 26.5% in 2005"

I was just thinking about this recently. My middle daughter is playing basketball. On the days that she practices, she comes home and eats a good meal with a smile. On the days that she doesn't, she picks at her food and snacks the rest of the night on junk food. I came to the conclusion that organized sports and activities really are the best way to get teens exercising and eating right.

Asking our community: Why do you think schools offer physical activity opportunities only for kids who have the talent to entertain with sports games and not just as activities for all teens to promote good health? Do you think the tide will change anytime soon? Please share your thoughts in the comments area.

More: Quiz: Are you raising a healthy teen?

Too Much Food in Teens' Diet Is What Is Causing Obesity originally appeared on About.com Parenting of Adolescents on Thursday, November 12th, 2009 at 07:15:23.

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Thrifty Thursday: Check Out Clearance Racks with Your Teens

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 05:00:52 +0000

My aunt said something about her twin 18-year-old daughters recently that I found to be true of my own daughter - and I never noticed. She said, "When my girls enter a store at the mall, they make a bee line right for the clearance rack first." So does my oldest and she always manages to find the best deals there for clothes that she can wear that day. It seems the clearance racks aren't just for the past season's stuff anymore.

Does your teen check out the clearance items in their favorite stores? Do you? Please share your stories, opinions and advice in our comments area.

More: Thrifty Tips for Families | Five First-rate Opportunities to Talk Money Sense with Your Teen

Follow the About.com Parenting & Family's Thrifty Thursday:

Thrifty Thursday: Check Out Clearance Racks with Your Teens originally appeared on About.com Parenting of Adolescents on Thursday, November 12th, 2009 at 05:00:52.

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Teenagers Are Changing the World

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 09:22:32 +0000

Revisiting guest author Susan Heim's article today. She formerly was the Senior Editor for the bestselling Chicken Soup for the Soul series and is an author. She has written about a wonderful experience her son has had and what you and your teen can learn from it. Talk about it and find local volunteer opportunities with your teen. Set a goal to become involved and use the volunteering as some one-on-one time with your teenager - you know how hard it is to get some of that - or do it as a family activity.

Related Resources:

Teenagers Are Changing the World originally appeared on About.com Parenting of Adolescents on Tuesday, November 10th, 2009 at 09:22:32.

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Fall Activities for Teens - Week Twelve

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 08:10:28 +0000

These fall activities for teens can be done individually, with friends or with the whole family. Each week has four different types of teen fall activities: Make This (Recipe), Craft This, Learn How and Get Out and Go! Each activity idea is fun for your teen. Check out week twelve's fall activities for teens now.

Fall Activities for Teens - Week Twelve originally appeared on About.com Parenting of Adolescents on Monday, November 9th, 2009 at 08:10:28.

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Daughter "Out" and Now Mean to Us

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 08:40:00 +0000

From a mom on our forum: My college aged daughter has recently begun to "out" herself as lesbian to certain family members and a few friends. We have known about & willingly & lovingly accepted her as lesbian for many, many months now. Recently she outed herself to some friends and their children (age 7, 10 & 12). When I asked why she outed herself to their children, she got upset with me. I only asked because she is so worried about the wrong people finding out and i was afraid these kids might share her secret. She hasn't even told her two brothers yet (one much younger and one about her same age). She was only home from college for a few days, but she withdrew herself from me & my husband any chance she could. She refused to give me a hug good-by when she went back to the dorms. In our phone conversations, I almost always end by saying "i love you" and she won't respond with the same. We have told her many times that we love her & support her and only want her to be happy. But now, she has begun to withhold her love from us. When my husband tried to ask her about this, she either completely ignores us as if we aren't even there or she makes up some excuse but still will not say "I love you too".

I think she may feel that we aren't supportive enough or proud of her for coming out. So we asked to her to let us know What she does want from us, but she never can seem to answer that question.